The world is so... unfair.

Recently, i find myself waking up with bad headache, sadness and utter frustration... even though it's not yet Hell Week.

All these times, i thought the reason why Xurt likes Wendy a hell lot is because Wendy isn't that much insanely jealous and possessive of him. I thought the reason why he dumped me off(even though we're not on) is because i was too tight of him...
But whaddayouknow, after i stopped the connection between me and him as lovers, i see on his facebook profile that he's praising and liking Wendy more for being... selosa and possesive of him. It's all bullshit, hard to believe but it's the whole fucking truth. Don't tell me Xurt will praise Wendy next for being a Xaverian... or else coz she's not totally a Xaverian not even 0.000000001%. Now, i don't know if ever he remember the reason why he hates me so, was he really that crazy or that he never totally liked me at all ever since. It's something that is considered to be fishy and at the same time sad.

Other than Xurt, everytime i come home (even on Loyola Heights), i always been in pain because of those only two(no, make that one) whom i consider as "family". Yesterday, i was dumbstruck when i read the messages my sister sent me. She asked me for the pldt phone so she could call dad, then her next message was rather awful. she told me that she's so sick of me not replying and that if dad got mad, it would be my fault. she wished for a sister whom she could count on but instead she got me... Yeah right, as if those messages came on time (rolls eyes). Those messages(which were sent by her at around 2:30pm) arrived in my inbox at about 5:30 pm. I tried to explain this fucking problem but instead she just ignored and rather coldly said "okay lang yun" as if those messages really came in my inbox at 2:30 pm(the last time i checked out my phone was 3:00 and there wasnt any messages yet). I wished for a sister who could understand me a lot, but instead i got her.
As for my dad, he went a bit lighter with us but still stringy with what we need. Last sunday, i got a new phone... after all the scary(na katakot takot na... as dad would say it) negotiation we have to fix. he wants to buy a phone if it's 0% on the credit card. When we couldnt find a deal which sells the phone at 0%, dad just told me to pay him Php 830 every month for 6 months to pay off the phone(which i think is a bit fair). But still it's not fair because before we were off to buy the phone, my dad rants about buying hams and tshirts(that were not meant for us to enjoy but) for the customers and those dirty, fat-assed commissioners who would take 50% off of the things we sold to a customer they bring. I can't believe a parent would rather prioritize those people he doesn't know more than his child, especially the one he consider affectionately as junior. I better enjoy his too-good-to-be-true, Xurt-like sweetness because by january he would be the devil again.

The world is terribly... unfair.

Living it BIG TIME...

After a long, tiring monday last week, i went to my condo and turned the TV on. The channel that was on TV when i turned it on was Nickelodeon and the episode of iCarly was about to end. After iCarly ended, it was time for Big Time Rush- a show about the lives of Xurt's favorite band. Since im too tired to study on the spot and too curious on why Xurt loves that band as much as i love Tokio Hotel, i decided to watch the show.

My first Big Time Rush show was the episode(Big Time Crib) when the boys wanted to have a better room in the Palm Springs Hotel but Gustavo and Mr. Bitters doesn't want the boys to have a better room(or at least refurbish it). But they managed somehow to find a way to make their room so awesome that they even had a swirly slide(AWESOME with the capital A)...

After watching that got me soooooo hooked with Big Time Rush. The next thing i knew, i was downloading some of their songs on the internet. Songs like Big Time Rush, Halfway there, City is ours, Till i forget about you, Famous and This is our someday are quite inspiring and the beats they have are so fresh and so cool.

Tokio Hotel may not like this, but Big Time Rush suuuure got style. ;)