And im like "Fuck you..."

Yeah... it's official, Xurt and Wendy are "mag on" or aka together now. Yes, i cried all night the moment i heard the news but eventually i became alright. I bet Wendy's posse, Abby, Elyzza and Kassel, were so proud with their achievement of helping out Wendy win over Xurt that their testosterone and pride were satisfied for an hour and in Abby and Kassel's part, they were prouder of this so-called achievement than the fact they both passed the UPCAT. As the months go by, i see them professing their love for each other by their profile pics (In Wendy's pic, she was like wearing a "Diaz" shirt and Xurt with both hands with fingers forming "W"). One of Xurt's pics even made Xurt look like a jerk in the current Third Year's way of thinking. Their judgment over poor Xurt was really harsh that they call him "Wow Ulam". I feel quite sad for him that i wanted to lash back at them "So, kung yun naman ang gusto ni Xurt na iparating kay Wendy na pagmamahal, pabayaan nyo nalang sya". And last, last, last(i dunno, but it coincided with my mom's third death anniversary when i saw it) week, i found out that i was being unfriended by Xurt on FB. It turned out that Xurt and Wendy had an argument about me, according to Dale when i told him the miserable thing that happened. I never poked into their monkey business ever since they've hooked up, why on earth will they fight over me and eventually have me unfriended by Xurt?! By the way Xurt treated me, they probably had a fight really much intense that i never such had when i was still the apple of Xurt's seemingly Chinese eyes- According to my Lit 14 prof yesterday, your crush or significant other usually share a lot of characteristics that you like with your mom(if youre a guy) or your dad(if you're a girl). That thing is called "Oedipus Complex". It was probably much more intense than the "Kaye issue" we had before. Speaking of Kaye, i remember when i still knew his password, i came upon his messages and one of his messages(dating from march 2010) was from Kaye Macalalad, his old crush. Kaye got a boyfriend in Switzerland, which left Xurt devastated. When Xurt found out that she got a boyfriend, she said sorry to him. And while he was having a broken heart, he told Kim Macalalad, his friend who got a crush on him back then, told her of his woes. After all of what happened to them, they still remained friends.
It could be terribly hard for Xurt back then, but if he was to read this blog post right now(which i think he will never do), he would tell me that i will eventually find a guy better than him just like what happened to him with Kaye(pshhh... Kaye is WAY BETTER than Wendy). His problem back then is probably nothing compared with the way he is treating me now. When he hooked up with Wendy, unlike Kaye, he doesn't mind those around him. When Kaye hooked up with her boyfriend, she said sorry to Xurt. When he hooked up with Wendy, unlike Kaye, i got unfriended. When Kaye hooked up with her boyfriend, she did not unfriend Xurt. The only person i know that he unfriended was his father, so if he's treating me the way he's treating his father, then i would treat him they way i treat my father. He might say if ever he knew how i reacted with this shit of his, "I did this because Wendy is super way better than you, that you are a notorious "Selosa" that you made selos on Kaye and Wendy while Wendy only became selosa on you, and why would I go back to you? blah bla blah blah blah blah..."
It's not the point, the number of the people i've been jealous with doesn't matter but it's how we dealt with the issues thrown at us. My jealousy with Kaye went away when Xurt once told me that he and Kaye are not compatible enough while me and him are compatible. After him saying that, i don't feel heavy and troubled about Kaye anymore. And that peace of mind had no unfriending and frenzied downpour of affection with lots of effort in Xurt's part involved.

It could be a bit immature to do so, but i felt that this is the way to get over him once and for all. And it will not be as harsh as the third years'. I plan to write on my reflection paper about my heartbreak with Xurt and how i am making progress in getting over him. I will write as if he will not come back and i will write all my heart out just to get myself a B+ or an A and move on as i move on with my bleak but interesting freshman year. After all, a reflection paper is all about pouring in your feelings to make yourself feel better.

Montessori is soooo like... Poveda??

Last tuesday there was no classes so i decided to visit my long time best friend and fellow Montessori alumni Gt Hidalgo. In his condo room, Gt and i exchanged some news from Montessori that we both find terrifying. It turned out that Gt also shared the same kind of view on the present condition of Montessori. According to Gt, Montessori turned into something like "Love in the club..." and that students there, instead of treating each other as something like brothers and sisters(like we used to do) and usually having romatic relationships from kids from other schools, they just hook up with each other. It seemed like everyone in Montessori has his/her own romantic partner or someone to be linked with. Kash Kraft(Mrs. Dancing Zombie's lil sis) now has a boyfriend and (you'll never guess who he is...) he is none other than the kid who piss Montessori off big time, VK Castillo(HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...lolz). And the worst thing there is that those people who should discourage these kinds of things and set examples are the ones who are fucking propagating this kind of balderdash. Wendy used to get into a fight with Xurt everytime she would try to get close with him, until one(totally unfortunate) day, she sought the help of her bffs Elyzza, Kassel, Twinkle and Abby. One day, they went to SM Lipa to celebrate Twinkle's birthday by inviting Karlo and Xurt. Then kaboom... Wendy successfully had Xurt worshiping on her feet and stripped Xurt's affections for me. The prospects of Xurt coming back to me is bleak and unclear. This will go on just as long as those 5 girls are still together(that means they haven't left for college yet) and when the time comes that they will depart from each other the way our closely-knit batch departed, im afraid that Xurt will have no feelings for me anymore. But i will be so happy if one day someone doorbelled my condo in Loyola Heights or looked for me in school and it turned out to be Xurt with a bouquet of roses(or other flowers) and a box of chocolates, smiling that seemed to be sunshine like the last time we met.


Back to the IJ Montessori is being a second-rate, trying hard, copycat version of Powhvedahh, Montessori is being like a phoney version of Poveda since both are into romance, boys, flirtiness and speaking Spanish(Hey did you know, the new teacher who looks like JR, sir JP teaches the High School in Espanyol). Thank God for Povedans at least they do super well in school and they value their education more. those from Montessori dont care about education and how it will affect them anymore, they dont even do their responsibilities as student leaders. All they value the most in their lives is popularity and how to satisfy their testosterones and kilig hormones.

Montessori is really going crazy.

Running through the monsoon without Bill

What would you feel if the guy whom you are dying to meet since you were 13 is not the guy whom you used to look up to and admire from afar?
I would feel really bad of course, if that happens to me. Actually, that situation could probably happen this year and unfortunately, my favorite singer/ crush/ style icon Bill Kaulitz, is no longer the visual kei hair-donning German singer whom i used to love because his sense of style mirrors mine. Instead, he became a different person and i don't like the way he changed.

Late last year, Bill told VJ Chino of MYX that Tokio Hotel plans to perform in the Philippines this 2010. By then his style was a bit okay(look at "World behind my wall" vid) but he was already different from the Bill i used to love when i was 13 up to 15. Okay, he might be beginning to change shockingly when i was 15, but all those changes are still tolerable and little compared to the rate he has now. Back then when i was 14, he used to loathe eating veggies and that was one of the many reasons why i like him. Now look at him, so skinny as a stick and he's now a vegetarian. The reason why that ostrogoth as well as his kambal sa uma and Georg became exclusive veggie eaters, i don't know. After that, Bill began to change so differently that i don't recognize him, especially Bill Kaulitz my fashion icon. I can't believe Bill ditched his already awesome tshirts, neat leather jackets, diesel pants and adidas sneaks for some outrageously flamboyant clothes like Dsquared outfits and Rick Owen high heels. Then he ditched his super cool visual kei hairstyle for a sucky hairstyle ala Colonel Sponz. Bill thinks his style became more masculine than before but i say no because he's wrong. I shout "Niet, niet" over and over on his statement because more people mistook him as a gay in his new style than before. He's a really dumb dumbass. He thinks that he's the coolest rockstar ever with his very gay new style, but nooooooo... he looks grotesque and revolting that i regret lusting after him. If i see him like that when he sings here in the Philippines, i will throw a thick business book at him, pour acid on his ugly face or tell him that his crush Edward Cullen will never date him because he's got himself an ugly, colonel Sponz hairstyle.

Why can't Bill be like other rockstars instead? Why does he have to be different from Billie Joe Armstrong, Yael Yuzon or even Gerard Way? Why does he have to wear such extravagant and flamboyant clothes even if he just walk around the streets? Why do Tokio Hotel have to have a really strange concert presence and sing emo songs?
Im so disappointed, he thinks he is so cool while in fact, he isn't. If he goes on like this, someday he'll have an infliction on his stomach, body mass, lungs, heart, blood pressure, nervous system or his whole integumentary system.

It makes me so sad that i broke down into tears every time i think about him. Maybe the reason why he looks so revolting for me is that, maybe, in my conscience's opinion, it's because God is punishing me for lusting after that guy. I abuse my admiration for Bill so much that it made God dismayed. He made Bill change like that so He would show me how dismayed he was with me. What i may be doing may be a natural thing for teenagers like me, but maybe im taking it too far that it's hurting Him. Maybe if i lessen(or stop a bit if possible), Bill will get better. Maybe when he get better, i'll see the wonderful, meat-eating, childish Bill i used to adore. If not, then i have to accept it(seriously) and move on.
So i hope when Tokio Hotel goes here in the Philippines, Bill wears his hair nice and long while in a awesome looking Dsquared tshirt, skinny jeans and black boots or sneaks. No Colonel Sponz hairstyle, huge feather-whatever or leather pants business. Or else i will make the hullabaloos from Plants vs. Zombies spit on him until he falls like the Dancing Zombie(or aka Michael Jackson).

Not only they are TERRORISTS but they are RACISTS too, huh?

Hot, dark skinned, tanned, fashionable, sexy, wavy haired, model-type, patient, feminine and rather bitchy.
The kind of girl some Tokio Hotel fan girls would want for Bill Kaulitz. Someone who's like Beyonce, Rihanna, Chanel Iman or Kim Kardashian- best known for being oh-so fashionable and downright lascivious to the point they already hooked up with loads of guys.
While everybody knows the kind of girl Bill would want is an understanding, talkative, spontaneous girl who looks like Ashley Olsen( as much as possible is a German who can speak in German or live in another country who can speak in German). Some TH fans still press their desires really hard and even think Bill's preference is ugly compared to their choice for him. They wanted to see him live, make babies and drink milk with a bitchy, tanned gallows bird who isn't exactly his type of girl.

While they flame and disagree on the type of girl Bill would be infatuated with, the worst is that when someone says that a very pretty Asian chick(e.g Yubin of Wonder girls, Linda Chung, Maggie Cheung Ho Yee circa Old time buddy, the Japanese singer one TH fan talked about some time ago) would look cute with Bill. Seriously, a lot would flame and throw off evil comments saying that "Bill doesn't like girls who have small eyes" and those sort of stuffs.
What the hell is that all about? I don't remember Bill saying or implying that otherwise im not listening to "World behind my wall" right now since Bill is such a skin-headed, misguided moron whose line of thinking about humans is from fifty decades ago. That means naive Herge from the racist 1920s had more sensitivity about racism than them.

The truth is, i don't know how on earth those confounded "fans" ever thought that Bill is better off with someone who doesn't really capture much of his fancy. Huh, as if those Bashi-bazouks knew Bill better than Bill knew himself... It's just like pairing Harry Potter off with Madame Rosmerta or Dumbledore with Sybill Trelawney. If they are really fans, they should accept and respect Bill's preferances or what other's opinions are. They shouldn't really force other people about what they want. Thank God, none of them ever became Bill Kaulitz or else if he does hook up with such an ostrogoth, i would rather die in a plane crash in the Himalayas than hear that on the Tokio Hotel Network. =p

A rock poem....

No, it's not at all what you've expected the moment you read the title dawg. So if you're expecting some cheesy, emo or pointlessly frustrated and angry poems that bring about the pangs of pain and dispair, then get the f*** off.

A while ago, as i was fooling around in our autosupply shop and at the same time reviewing for my monthly exams tomorrow and reading a book about Jose Rizal being afraid of Jai Ho people when he was a kid. Out of the blue, i randomly made a very satirical and stupid poem in Filipino about my uncle who lives in Hong Kong and whose name is Rocky.

Mabato

Ang mabato ay mabato.
May tito akong pangalan ay "Mabato"
Kung sa Ingles sya ay si "Rocky".
Mahilig sa Heinaken
at bano kay Doraemon.

Marami syang bato
sa kanyang bahay na bansot.
Ang kanyang buhay naman ay
puro bato.

Iisa lang ang masasabi ko sa yo...
"...Bato bato sa langit, ang tamaan
huwag magalit."

Ang masasabi mo naman sa akin
sa mabato mong Ingles ay...
"... Want to eat some more?"

At sa lahat, ang masasabi nila
sa atin...
...Ano ba 'to??!! Puro nalang
mga bato. Mukha na kayong bato.
Di bale, magkaanak naman kayong bato.

Baka naman sila ang mas mabato kesa sa aten.
Ayos lang, dahil kung binato ka ng bato
batohin mo nalang ng tinapay.

*bow*

What if i made a German version of this one??
That's okay, as long as it's not Chinese(particularly Mandarin, Cantonese and especially Fukien), he won't understand it. ;-)